Archive for November, 2011


Porn in Perspective

So, I know I teased you all recently (pun intended) that those among you interested in seeing my erotica-writing side might get a little peek at my skills without me giving up my super-secret, more kink-oriented venue under NAME REDACTED. I’m still going to do that, but haven’t quite worked out the best logistics under which to do that (though a story is already written).

In the meantime, do you want to know how I feel about porn?

Well, I’ve mentioned it from time to time around here at the blog (most famously here and here, and some of my views religiously/scripturally have changed since then, but my basic thrust *wink* is the same), but now I’ve also done a guest post about porn and attitudes about it (mostly my own) at Adventures in Estrogen, a blog by one of my Twitter pals Lady Estrogen.

I don’t go into any gory details or reveal any of my own kink areas in it, so it should be relatively safe even for relatives and others who know me in real life to read. Still, you may not want to know why I think there are good things about porn, and so it’s up to you whether to go read it, though I’d love for you to visit Lady Estrogen even if you don’t want to read my piece. And it is…

Porn Is Great & Porn Is Good…Sorta


Lack of Focus

Or, perhaps, the title of this post should be “The Wrong Focus.”

Some of the most fervent people pursue their missions from entirely the wrong standpoint, and so it is with many conservative, fundamentalist Christians, because they aren’t really as focused on the fundamentals as their descriptor would suggest.

See, my problem with the “fundies” isn’t so much that they want to promote biblical ideals and Bible-based behavior as it is that they put at the top of their agenda subjects on which Jesus didn’t really focus and/or that are only hinted at vaguely in the Bible…while also putting at the bottom of their priority list those things on which Jesus spoke most clearly and directly.

So, on the one hand, they’ll pick out a Bible passage about ancient punishments for hitting a pregnant woman in the belly and killing her unborn child, along with God’s words in the Book of Jeremiah “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you” and say, “See! God hates abortion! Let’s go have a huge campaign against women controlling their own bodies and hijack freedom of choice and science while ignoring more pertinent issues that affect more people.”

Never mind that causing the death of a woman’s fetus in an act of violence or irresponsibility was a crime because it assumed the woman wanted to give birth and you took that away from her (i.e. took the life that she had charge of). Also never mind that the quote from Jeremiah is about foreknowledge and foreplanning on God’s part, not about when life begins. Never mind that Jesus never once mentioned anything about fetuses, and his words are the ones Christians should focus on most.

And then, on the other hand, with poverty rising, kids and adults going without food, healthcare becoming increasingly inaccessible and the rich hoarding more and more of the money just because they can (even though they don’t need that much), you’ll see fundies cringe at any notion that even hints at socialism or talks about fairness and sharing, even though Jesus spent huge gobs of his time talking about economic fairness and taking care of the less fortunate.

Not to mention the fact the early Christian church essentially practiced communism, or something very close to it.

But they’ll ignore that and point to his parable of the talents and claim Jesus was a free market capitalist even though the parable is talking about spiritual growth and responsibility, not wealth creation.

Shaking my damn head…


People Are Complex and Compelling…Even the Ones Who Don’t Exist

If you’ve visited this blog for some time, you know I was for a while writing a novel in chunks here, between other postings. It was a contiguous storyline, rolled out more or less episodically (really, snippets of chapters since writing whole chapters as blog posts was too unwieldy). This was both an experiment (to see how well-received it might be, to roll out a novel as I was writing it from scratch) and a labor of love (as the first draft of what might turn out to be a novel I try to publish one day).

If you’re one of those people, you also know that with the crush of real life and the addition of more blogs to my life, a few of them devoted to fiction (erotica in some cases), that project stalled.

But it isn’t dead yet. The characters in that far-from-finished tale (the resulting novel of which would still only be the first in an epic series) continue to speak to me at times. In fact, sometimes they won’t fucking shut up, and it can get really annoying. Good thing for them that I love them.

Characters are important to me. Who they are, what they say and how the interact with each other and make decisions…well, it’s fascinating to me (whether in the “Cleansed By Fire” novel, or at my Tales of the Whethermen blog, or my erotica and fetish stories). You might, however, ask: “Why? You created them, so you know what they’re going to do.”

If only that were true. Much like living-and-breathing people, I can’t always predict their actions. Familiarity and experience with someone will give you a lot of clues and insight into what they will do, but they can still surprise you. So too do my characters. No matter how thoroughly I plot a story, in any genre or whatever medium, characters will surprise me and do things I didn’t plan on them doing.

Sometimes, things I didn’t want them to do, because it complicates my plans or changes the direction of my plot. Usually, though, I see the necessity in letting that happen, just as I acknowledge that unexpected decisions by friends, families, co-workers, etc. are not always bad ones. Usually, they are neutral or positive in the long run.

I hope my characters in my fiction continue to be complex (or perhaps I should hope they become so; some of you might argue the notion that they’re complex right now). I hope they continue to challenge me.

At the same time, I hope I don’t become lazy (assuming I’m not already).

You see, it’s easy to write in black-and-white. To have clear good and evil and to have defined winners and losers. For the people who do right to be rewarded and for those who do wrong to receive some kind of justice. But that’s not life, now is it? And I try to make sure my fiction feels enough like real life so that it not only rings true but also sucks you into my world, to give you as immersive an experience as you can get.

Yes, I love my villains and my heroes both. I love those who are neither. I love that sometimes a villain can do something noble and a hero do something awful. Even when I hate what people do and what happens to them, sometimes I have to accept them for who they are…even when they’re fictional. I have to accept life doesn’t always go my way, even when I’m the one creating the reality.

(This is one part of a kind of thematic dual-post. For the “other part,” click here and visit my Tales of the Whethermen blog)


Online Recognition

I have no idea what the “Versatile Blogger Award” is, really. Did a Google search and what I pull up is a lot of blogs that have received the award. Wherever it originated from is apparently far down the hits from my search results.

Which, of course, makes me dubious about the overall value of the award in terms of being a true recognition of anyone’s quality.


I got this award because Satan Goes to Sing-Sing asked her follow tweeps on Twitter if anyone wanted an award. I said, “Sure, why not?” and she decided that I was an entertaining enough blogger to make the cut of the five people she was to give out the award to.

And that, my friends, is the value. The award itself means shit-all to me. But the fact that another blogger and entertaining denizen of the Twitterverse finds me worth reading…that’s the thing that keeps me writing online.

So, you can see what “Satan” (really, she’s not a bad person…she’s just drawn that way…oh, that’s Jessica Rabbit…still, she’s cool) had to say about me and four other bloggers here. If you don’t mind references to porn, furry sex (and other kinky stuff), some swearing and other things along with just general wit, observations and talk about the art of writing and getting through life (and if such things DO bother you, why are you here at my blog?) check out her blog and follow her on Twitter.

Oh, and here’s my award…it takes up way less room than the plaques I used to get back when I was in elementary school, high school and college.


Random Notes

Just a collection of quick thoughts in lieu of deep ones (no comments about any lack of depth in previous posts; I’m fragile):

Yes, Democrats Also Annoy Me

I know I rag on the Republicans a lot around here. And the right-wing folks in particular, most of whom belong to that party, when they’re not choosing the Nazi Party instead or something. Moreover, I give the Tea Party a lot of shit, but they’re are, after all, willfully bat-shit crazy so I’m entitled. You may say to yourself, “Isn’t this guy a journalist? Where’s the balance?” Well, first of all, I’m not a journalist here at this blog; I talk shit. Secondly, the Dems piss me off plenty. They fall short and fail miserably on many levels. But I’ll still vote for them over the Republicans 90% of the time. Why? For the same reason that if I have to choose between being around passive-aggressive people or ones who seek to pummel me in the face daily, I’ll take the former, thanks very much (yes, the Republicans would be the outright bullies).

Make Sure the Clothes Are All Yellow or Green and Have Crosses on Them

If you’re like me, you’re exhausted after shopping all day yesterday to buy gifts for Michelle Duggar’s upcoming 20th baby shower. If you’ve been able to avoid knowing who the Duggars are, more power to you. I’m jealous. I’ll have something to say about them and their 20th child later this week probably, and how they represent so much of what’s wrong with our values and priorities in this country. For now, let me simply let you in on their secret plan. They will stop having kids when they reach 21 of them. This is because 3 is an important biblical number and so is 7. And three 7s are really super-duper powerful. So, when that 21st child is born, the spiritual gestalt will be complete, the 21 children will combine into one powerful entity known as Voltron Jesus, and they will have adventures and shit to combat Satan and put off Armageddon a bit longer so that they can lead more people to Christ and the joy of having way more children than one should ever have.

How Long Before I Start Losing Count?

Today will mark the 14th year that I have been married to my lovely wife. Please, no sympathy cards; I’m pleased as hell to be tied to her, figuratively or literally. Here’s to possibly a couple more 14-year stretches to add onto that, and may they continue to be better and better. And here’s to me hopefully not doing anything that will cause her to ridicule me publicly in her blog.


That Damned Moving Target

I may have already kind of blogged about this, but maybe not. I have so many blogs now it’s hard to keep track.

When I started this blog, the parent of all the others…the genesis of my blogging self…it was intended to focus on religious and spiritual topics. Oh, I still could be snarky back in those early days, and irreverent, and I certainly had a liberal streak back then, too, but things were different.

My faith was in a somewhat more naive place. I wasn’t a closed-minded Christian who looked down upon non-Christians, but I did have a few beliefs that trended more conservative than liberal. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. In my politics as well I hold a few right-leaning views. That’s why I consider myself moderate and not left-wing. I’m strongly liberal, but not wholly liberal.

But what bugs me a little is knowing that people might come to this blog finding older posts first, and might get an idea of who I am and what I believe that doesn’t reflect where I am now, in a place where not only are my religious views more progressive but I’ve also started covering a lot more around here than just spiritual matters.

Also, I worry that people will come to me through my more recent posts and then go exploring back into the past and see things that conflict at least slightly with what I’m saying now. Will I be perceived as wishy-washy, inconsistent or hypocritical…or will they see that as growth and evolution?

Maybe I worry too much about it. I don’t know. I know that I need to update my various “about me” and “about this blog” pages. They need a huge refresh. But I also wonder, what should I do with my older posts that don’t feel to me like they are representative of my current views…or are skewed now in some way?

Do I delete them? Probably not. That seems dishonest and extreme.

Do I move them to some separate area of the blog? Seems like a big pain in the ass?

Do I go through them, after creating some new category, and put them in that category of “early beliefs” or something like that?

Do I do nothing. Probably not.

Or do I do something I haven’t thought of yet?

Maybe you have some thoughts? If so, share ’em.


Book of Addenduma, Chapter 1, Verses 1-15

It frequently comes to pass that a psycho extremist well-meaning and devout Christian will share with people, via street corner, Twitter, Facebook, blog, television program, radio program and/or the seat across from you on the bus or subway train…well, that something or another is terribly sinful in the eyes of God or incredibly pleasing in the sight of God (despite being very mean and hurtful to others).

It may occur to you at these times (or to other people whom you respect) to perhaps challenge said individuals to provide evidence from the Bible to support that such things are actually mentioned by God and/or His various agents through the ages, or that they are in line with Jesus’ teachings, or both.

If you do this, or encourage such actions by others, you are clearly a Christian-hating douche and should burn in the fires of Hell. Or perhaps you are a vile and wicked Muslim, who should first be tortured by government officials for simply existing, and then sent to burn in the eternal fires of Hell in that special corner God set aside for Hitler, abortion providers, followers of Islam and the makers of Teletubbies (especially the “gay” one).

I know it’s confusing to you, but what most Christians fail to note when providing such abusive soul-saving advice and guidance is that the pastors, Christian pundits and general whack-jobs…er, self-styled theologians who can’t even read Greek, Latin or Hebrew…um, fervent evangelists who taught them what was sinful and what was good (that doesn’t appear in the regular Bible and are in line with the new covenant set forth by Jesus) comes from a special book.

I mean, you can’t expect them to teach only from the source material that everyone has access to, can you?

Anyway, this special book was discovered by U.S. theologians around the same time politicians conveniently forgot that the Founding Fathers really weren’t all that religious and church-minded and started adding things like “In God We Trust” to the money and “Under God” in the Pledge of Allegiance in the 1940s and 1950s.

This book, I am happy to reveal to you hellbound heathens, is the book of the prophet Addenduma, who was provided with revelation from God in the year 56 A.D. and was aided by his trusty apprentice prophet Miscellanephat and their alien canine sidekick Randomog.

I will share excerpts from this holy example of God’s WordTM from time to time. For now, just a little bit from Chapter 1, verses 1 through 15:

1: Lo, for the words herein written by Addenduma are true and correct, for he is pleasing in Mine eyes and certainly not drunk on new wine (nor the old in broken bottles) and he hath neither lain with Miscellanephat nor known Randomog in the manner a man should know a woman after proper courtship and transfer of ownership from her father.

2: Indeed, Addenduma may hath lain once or twice with Miscellanephat and Randomog but that is not unpleasing in my sight for he said he was very, very wroth with himself and abased himself before Me and reminded Me that I had overlookethed the liaisons between David and Jonathan.

3: And forsooth, verily and huzzah! (or perhaps Yahoo!), as we are on the topic of congress, or knowing, or getting busy, or doing the horizontal hora, let it be known that a man should not lie down with another man, unless the man being laid with looks convincingly like a woman and his/her clothes were already off by the time the layor discovered a penis hanging from him…or her…or, whatever.

4: There is no particular reason for this. For I the Lord simply find it aesthetically unpleasing, though I have naught to say about woman-on-woman for it is very pretty in the sight of men.

5: About those women. Thou shalt not lie with a woman during her time of issue with blood nor shalt though even think of having sex with her during that time even though it is a necessary and harmless biological function and I often make her pillows of small soft pleasure ‘twixt her thighs rumble with pleasure during this time and ignite her desires. Thou shalt not do this because it is icky in my sight, though you no longer have to make her stay outside your home when Aunt Flow visits.

6: Speaking of sex, and the holy aftereffects thereof when you abstain from contraception, as I have commanded, you may not abort any pregnancy at any stage after conception for any reason. This is because I give souls to every collection of cells that stands a strong chance of going nowhere developmentally speaking and has nothing resembling human neurological function.

7: Oh, I never mentioned anything about not using contraception? My bad. That was supposed to be in Leviticus. Thou shalt not use contraception. I also waste my time putting souls in every sperm and every ovum because I’m inefficient that way.

8: Thou shalt not make note of the fact that most sperms and ova are never used and your body will shed them or consume them. Also, pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.

9: And no, thou mayest not pleasure thyself with thy hand or any foreign object, for I hate masturbation, even though it is never really mentioned in the Bible at all. Why? Do you want me to turn you into a pillar of salt or kill the first-born of your family? If you need a reason, see verse 7, you heathen.

10: Porn is evil. Even when it involves fully consenting adults in a safe and non-abusive environment and doesn’t degrade women. Unless the producers tithe 10% of the gross revenues post-production to Me.

11: Sex is evil. Even with your spouse. Unless you are trying to have children. I only made sex feel good to trip you up and send more of you to Hell. It’s getting crowded up here in Heaven and I really do not likest most of thou. Or thee. Or y’all. Or whatever.

12: Ignore any anachronisms in the Book of Addenduma. My beloved prophet’s mind sometimes travels to the future to gather the holy guidance he needs to put My will to these parchments, which may not stand up to the scrutiny of carbon dating, for carbon dating is a tool of Satan and his minions the evolutionists.

13: Free-market laissez-faire capitalism practiced within a non-inclusive, non-representative pseudo-democracy must be your way, for it is My way, and it’s My way or the Gehenna highway.

14: Thou shalt not gather in protest of the 1% who hold the majority of the wealth and withhold it from 99% of the population, for I the LORD never told you when the meek would inherit the Earth. But not now. Certainly not yet. Soon, though. Maybe.

15: Thou shalt only vote for the Republican Party in the United States, and suitably similar parties in other nations, for the Democrats are of less pleasing character to Me than the scum on your shoe after stepping on a diseased slug that was having sex with an earthworm on your rain-soaked driveway right in the middle of a puddle of oil and antifreeze.


My Man Milo

Around here, he’s known as Son of Blue (stepson, really, but why nit-pick?), and in hip-hop musical circles and on Twitter, he’s known as Milo. In any case, he’s already been responsible for putting out one batch of great music under the Nom de Rap monicker with a couple pals, he’s done a few live performances with some other friends as The Dilla Gents, and now he’s got a mixtape of his own solo stuff as Milo with the album title “I Wish My Brother Rob Were Here.” (get that here)

He’s gotten some good buzz around the new music in just the few days since he released the tunes online for free. He’s been reviewed in print here…and also here…and here besides. A well-respected critic and connoisseur of music, especially hip-hop, did a way-cool, detailed video review here of the mixtape.

This isn’t gangster rap or stuff about drinking, drugs and getting laid. This is stuff from his heart, nerdy and sentimental, philosophical and silly…and downright good stuff. It’s like literary-style tweets and hit-and-run poetry against a backdrop of musical beats, and you need to check it out.

I’m not just saying that because I love Son of Blue. It’s because he’s good. And because I love the shit out of him and he’s the nerd who always has my geeky back in any fight, real or metaphorical.

It might also be because he’s a sophomore in the hinterlands of Wisconsin at a small, conservative college that sometimes drives him nuts, working toward a philosophy degree. Every ear listening to him puts him one tiny percentage point closer to making a name for himself in music…good music. Not that crap you hear coming out of most cars and bars and shit.

And if he never becomes famous, or renowned or even semi-professional with the music, he still deserves a listen. (Besides, it’s free…right herefree download)

Hell, your ears deserve a little bit of Milo, aka Son of Blue, aka possible future philosophy graduate who might be living with me, his mom and his sister for a few years while he gets ready to start up his own farm and spread the message of ovo-lacto-vegetarianism.

Deacon Blue is the blogging persona of editor and writer Jeffrey Bouley. The opinions of Jeff himself on this blog, and those expressed as Deacon Blue, in NO WAY should be construed as the opinions of anyone with whom he has worked, currently works, or will work with in the future. They are personal opinions and views, and are sometimes, frankly, expressed in more outrageous terms than I truly feel most days.

Jeff Bouley


Jeff Bouley

To find out more about me professionally, click here. To find out more about me generally, click here.



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My superhero fiction blog, click here


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My parenting blog, click here

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November 2011

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