I Can See Clearly by Miz Pink

I ain’t blinded by the dazzling delivery of charismatic pastors. I ain’t awed by mega-churches. I don’t go weak in my knees when I see some one fall to the ground after being faith-healed. I don’t raise up my hands and start swaying when someone busts out in some “oingo boingo” tongues kinda talking. I’m not impressed by divinity degrees.

I can see clearly.

I can see clearly when a pastor is raking in big money from his mega-church, groomed like a Hollywood star and dressed in suits that most pastors can only dream of. I can tell how fake a faith-healing pastor on TV is; how they play off people being suckers and wantin desparately to believe. I can tell that you’re just deluding yourself and speaking gibberish and calling it tongues or worse yet you are feeling left out and just start yammering some nonsense so that everyone will thing you have the spirit. I can tell when your preaching your own agenda and not the word of God hisself.

Because I can read clearly too.

I can read my bible and I do thank you very much. It tells us how people will becomes lovers of themselves and spread false teachings and claim to be acting in Jesus’s name when they’re really just cashing in.

You aren’t all frauds out there I know that. There are lots of good preachers and pastors out there and even the ones with screwed up ideas often mean well.

But those of you who ARE cashing in. I see you. I see you clearly. But that doesn’t matter really because what you should be worried about is that God sees through you even more than I do.

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Two-fer Tuesday: Spiritual Healing by Miz Pink

Today I, Miz Pink, shall take you to the Book of Jimmy…I mean, James, chapter 5, verses 13-18. (We’re going in a way different direction than Deke on this twofer tuesday topic)

People who love faith healing love this passage. And I really resent them for that and for abusing this poor little bit of God’s word so badly. Are ye sick? Get them elders togather to pray over ye and ye shall be healed. And if ye ain’t, ye must not have enough faith.

Deke has complained about the word of faith folks enough (here and here and here for example) and this is just a variation on that.

Dont get it twisted because James does want to show us the importance of prayer. I don’t think he wants us to warp his meaning all to heck though. Let me copy here what he said in the bible:

Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing praise. Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working. Elijah was a man with a nature like ours, and he prayed fervently that it might not rain, and for three years and six months it did not rain on the earth. Then he prayed again, and heaven gave rain, and the earth bore its fruit.

Where praytell, did James say the person would be healed? Saved, yes, healed no. (For some other thoughts on what St. Jimmy wrote, if you care, go here or here or here as some starting points)

There is no promise that having a bunch of folks prayer over you and slather oil on you is going to cure your disease or injury. If that were the case, why did Paul have that “thorn in his side” that he couldn’t get to go away and that God told him he didn’t need to be cured of anyway? God never promised that we could pray our way out of sickness on the regular. If so, we wouldn’t be dying, would we, except by fatal accidents with large cliffs or speeding cars or whatever. We’ll get sick sometimes; that’s life.

Seeking prayer when we are sick or suffering is to find some relief. Maybe healing but maybe not. Strength, yes. Support, yes. Forgiveness, yes. Cure? Not always. Maybe not even often.

If you’re really, really sick I suggest maybe you go to the doctor first, and on the way to her office maybe ask some of the elders to pray for your good doc to do some good diagnostic work with you. Then after your appointment is over maybe the prayers and whooping and hollering and oil and whatnot.

Just a thought.

You Forgot the Video Cam Again?

I don’t have any deep thoughts today. Little Girl Blue turned 3 today and we had a nice little birthday for her, just me, Mrs. Blue and Son of Blue. I’m tuckered out but also have to stay up into the wee hours a bit to finish work for a client, so just a quickie post for tonight.

Soooo, I’m keeping an eye on my girl in the living room while my wife is surfing the ‘Net, and I hear some half-crazed sounding guy in full “preacher voice” talking about how he healed some woman of a tumor, and it came out of her physically and slid down her leg to the floor. (My wife was on some site with video of this guy; I don’t know who the hell it was.)

And I’m thinking to myself cynically: I know God can work wondrous miracles through people, and maybe it’s true. But, why do they always have videos of people getting healing touches and collapsing in some spastic fit because they’ve been “carried away by the spirit” or some old woman with a walker who suddenly tosses it away because she is healed (never mind that no one in the audience knows this woman and she’s probably had two good legs her whole life). Why is it that these crazy sounding healing preachers always have video of that shit, but they never manage to have the camera on when a tumor slides out of a woman’s body or something equally dramatic. Because you know, if I had stuff like that going on, I’d tape it, and bring the tumor to a physician for confirmation that it was really a tumor.

That’s just me, of course. And I am cynical. I have faith in God, but often not in people.

And besides, preacher man also sounded like he could use some daily visits on the couch with a therapist and probably some meds, too. People may have thought Jesus was crazy, but I don’t get the impression he acted crazy.