Dear Vatican: Shut Up!

Dear Pope Benedict and the rest of the gang at the Vatican:

Although you have a long history of covering up pedophilia among priests and ignoring their victims, you seem to have a major bug up your butts regarding homosexuality (no pun intended). I find this interesting, given that pedophilia is non-consensual and abusive, and homosexuality is a grown-up decision.

In any case, after reading this article about how gay marriage somehow threatens the very future of humanity, I can only conclude that you are all hopelessly and irrevocably out of touch.

I mean, it’s not that I’m asking you to accept homosexuality on a personal basis. I’d just like you to leave everyone else alone about it and stop making it out to be so apocalyptic.

First, homosexuality has existed for millennia upon millennia and society hasn’t crumbled because of it. There have been times historically when societies long gone have accepted the practice and even celebrated it at times, and I don’t recall a single one of them collapsing because of man-on-man or woman-on-woman nookie. I’m pretty sure that legalized same-sex marriage won’t destroy the fabric of society either.

In case you haven’t noticed, homosexuality has been an option for people for a long time in the privacy of their own homes, cars, bath houses, hotel rooms, etc. Despite this, the vast majority of people choose the opposite gender. This despite having access to same-sex relationships since before pharaohs started having their scribes put down important information like grocery lists and newsletters in stone with the aid of chisels and hieroglyphs.

Even with a more open acceptance of homosexuality and bisexuality in more recent history, after a long stretch of burning people at the stake, incarcerating them or shunning them because of homosexuality, people still overwhelmingly choose traditional female-with-male sexual relations.

I really don’t see that making same-sex marriage legal and official is going to suddenly make people abandon in droves the traditional sexual instinct for the opposite gender. We’ll still have the overwhelming majority of people choosing the traditional route of marrying a person of a different gender. And then probably divorcing. And remarrying a couple times. And having kids as part of that dance. A few of them might even stay together.

But really, heterosexuality hasn’t done much to guarantee family stability or healthy relationships in all of recorded history, so I don’t see why you think same-sex marriages can make things any worse.

It’s kind of like your fretting over the use of contraception. Despite its wide availability, people still (*gasp*) continue to have babies. We’ve got what…7 billion people on the planet now? Are you really concerned we’re going to run out of humans because of a relative handful of gay or lesbian marriages?

Stop hitting the communion wine so hard, have a fucking smoke or a nice meal or something, and calm the fuck down.

Stick to misrepresenting Jesus’ message at the pulpit and leave society to the people who are actually in touch with it…and with reality.